Broken

Hello everybody,

I used to never be able to start blog posts (I still can’t) but now I can’t even think of titles! 🙂

Anyway, this is going to be quite a long rambly post so you might have to read quite a lot.

So lately, I don’t really know what’s going on with me. I’m involved in quite a few friendship arguments and it’s really getting to me.

I don’t know…one of the bloggers that I love once talked about how easy it would be if life was as easy as picking up dog poop. I know it sounds weird but hey, I’d love it if someone could come and get rid of the shit in my life. I mean why can’t it be that easy?

But yeah…lately I’ve just been feeling so broken. Like I’m shattered. I feel like a robot who has to act human… smile, laugh, and carry on living. Only I don’t see the point in living a life that’s filled with hate and troubles. Don’t get me wrong I’m not suicidal. It’s just I can’t think of any other way to describe how I’m feeling.

I don’t enjoy doing the things I loved any more, that’s partly why I haven’t been blogging. I’m always busy doing homework but before I used to try and find time to blog because I loved it. I still do and it feels good to be back.

I actually don’t know what is wrong with me.

If you think of a glass of water I’m like that (I know that sounds weird.) If that glass has been shattered once you can glue the pieces together and you can refill it with water (although the cracks will stay.) If someone carries on dropping it it will carry on shattering until some pieces will go missing and all the water that was once inside is gone. If you refill the glass the water will pour out because there will be pieces missing of that glass. Luckily though, nobody is that mean to a glass of water, unluckily that can happen to people. The only difference is that you can throw a broken glass of water away, and you can’t throw your life away without hurting others…family, friends….

I feel like I’m so broken that I have no emotion left. I just feel empty…hollow like someone can’t break me any more. Because there’s nothing left to break.

I’m sorry that this post is so depressed. But I’ve been keeping this to myself for so long that I need to let someone know.

I don’t want to make anyone depressed or sad….that’s why I’ve been smiling a school, pretending that life is fine when it’s far from fine.

Why can’t our life be normal? Why can’t we be eternally happy? Why do some people always have to be there to hurt you where it hurts most? I want to go back to being happy, enjoying art and other things I love, but I don’t know how. If you ever felt the same please could someone let me know because I don’t know how to deal with this.

I’m so sorry that this is so depressing I will have nicer posts soon! *virtual hugs*

Lots of love,

Rosypop xxx

 

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43 thoughts on “Broken

  1. genesisthe1st says:

    Awww, sometimes life gets pretty sh**ty and you have no control of it… The safest thing I could tell u is that it will pass… Life wont always be like this… You wont always be feeling this way… Cheer up! xoxo… 💋 💋💋

    Liked by 1 person

  2. pastelorchid says:

    Hi beautiful! Sometimes, I feel the same as you. It’s like you’re so worn out that things people say and do just kind of go through you. Don’t ever be afraid to talk to someone about how you feel…it really does help. If you need to, just vent it all out like you did in your post. When I read it, I was relieved that I wasn’t the only person who felt like that. Keep your head up lovely because your so important to so many people, including me. I wouldn’t be nearly as confident in my blog posts as I am today if it wasn’t for you who gave me amazing advice and welcomed me to the blogging community! Try and look at the brighter side of life, and though sometimes patches of light may be hard to find, it will get better. I think of life as the fur of a Dalmatian (101 Dalmatians), There are always going to be spots of darkness along the way, you just have to make sure that you see the light.

    I would be more than happy to talk to you and support you at any time:)
    Love always, Shreya xx

    P.S: You still manage to write the most amazing posts, even if they aren’t necessarily happy, and that is very hard to do! ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Bibliophile says:

    Heyyyy.
    Life does get annoying at times. 😢😢
    Cheer up, buddy!
    We all are here, you can talk to us if you want.
    If you still feel lonely, tell me and we can chat through emails, if you’re fine with that 😘
    *virtual hugs*
    Don’t worry, if you’re still feeling like that, eat. Yes, EAT. After all, we’re on this earth to eat, aren’t we? 😎
    Take care! 💜

    Liked by 1 person

  4. 💜infinitmagic💜 says:

    Food. Alway food.
    There’s really no way you can fix it. You and your friends just have to fight your way through, if it’s too late to say sorry.
    I’m sorry, I might be able to help you more if I had more information on your problem.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. pixiecake says:

    Hey. Don’t forget I’m always here for you, in the real world and in the blogging world. No matter how many arguments we have, I’m still here. Always. Someone sent me this quote from a movie, and it basically said: “It’s always okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.” It really helped me and I promise you can get through this. It’s okay. Xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Lucia R says:

    I’m so upset your feeling like this:(
    Each day maybe you could try and write down the happy things that you did, whenever you feel like crap you could go and read all the things that you’ve written down!!
    We are all here for you in the blogosphere, even if we can’t talk face to face, letters typed by our hands will do it for us xxxxxx

    “Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing the monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.”
    -C.S Lewis

    Liked by 1 person

  7. dewdrops0213 says:

    I get it. a while ago i was just moving my legs without energy like a robot- making my legs walk but not forcing it. Just going around… idk. but i’m serious. I don’t smile or laugh, i don’t want to force it. Hey, if it never rains, theres gonna be a draught. I guess returning to happiness makes it greater andmore special. Just focus on positive things, i know you can make it. It happens. Try to understand whats bringing you down, and mend the broken bonds.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. malaikaxxx says:

    Aww,you don’t deserve this! Let me give you some advice – it gets better. I’m guessing you are a teenager (like me) and I know, life is really rubbish when it comes to fallouts with friends. I hate it as well because you have built a really good bond between them and you blink and they aren’t yours anymore. I’m not going to tell you to stop being sad because….well….. Its an emotion all humans face! Just don’t worry too much about it, try and tell yourself, I’m not alone and you aren’t! You have all of your fans who will stick by you forever!

    If you ever need someone to talk to, my email is always open! And I understand if you don’t want to go into the details about what happened.

    Remember, you are NEVER alone! You don’t deserve this at all!

    mylifeasmalaika
    xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Fearlessly Loud says:

    I know life sucks sometimes and it feels like it always will stay like that. But trust me when I say that this will pass someday. Then you won’t feel broken ❤
    And don't forget we are all here for you. You can always talk to me xx

    Liked by 1 person

  10. 50shad3s0fjay says:

    I hope you’re okay, just remember life throws you hard times so you can appreciate the good times and this just means you have a hell of a lot of happy times to look forward to. Take things day by day and do little things each day to boost your happiness and make you feel good about yourself? Keep up with your blog because it’s something you want to do and that in turn will make you feel a bit of purpose in your life! and writing is definitely a great therapy and a great way to sort out your thoughts! I hope you start feeling happier soon hun 🌷

    Liked by 1 person

  11. averagegirlxx says:

    Oh my gosh I’m so sorry you’re feeling like this! I have gone through a long time feeling exactly like this (the way you compared it to the broken water glass is a perfect comparison) but it will get better, stay strong! I know you don’t feel like blogging at all but please don’t stop it all together you blog is one of my favourites! As for thinking you have to act happy so it doesn’t rub off on other people, don’t think like that talking to someone can really help bottling it all up inside you and pretending you’re fine will only make things worse trust me! You can to me anytime you want to, email me if you want to talk averagegirl22@gmail.com about anything at all. I hope you feel better soon, sending you all my love! Xxxx

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Allie says:

    Awwww I’m so sorry you feel this way right now… when I feel this way I sit in the sun… if there’s no sun I put on music and dance. When I am really sad and feeling broken I like songs/music that expresses that… I make up dramatic dances that show my pain and sorrow. Or I write… [= I hope you feel better Sweety. *hug* ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Lisa A. says:

    Aww! 😦 I’m sorry! I know how you feel. It’s unfortunately a part of life to feel this way here and there. I hope writing this post made you release some of that hurt. Feel free to talk with me or other bloggers. I promise the sun eventually shines. Hugs 💖

    Liked by 1 person

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